When You Sleep (REDONE)
by Red0313
Summary: Mulder refuses to let Scully die. This one is put together properly. So sorry!


IMPORTANT A/N:

I worked incredibly hard on this story. I feel its one of my best. With that being said, I had spent a lot of time on it. But, when I went to publish it, the first time, the formatting shifted on me, without me realizing this. I had no idea, until I got a few reviews. Let me tell you, not super nice ones. So, thank you to all who left reviews, giving me the benefit of the doubt. I appreciate it, so very much. To those who did not, yes, I do know what a paragraph is. I am an Language Arts major. Mistakes happen. Check out my other stories. But, I digress. Please enjoy this story. Let me know what you think. No copy right intended.

* * *

I had another nose bleed today. It was one of the worst. Mulder and I were doing paperwork, nothing major, and I noticed a drop of blood on my keyboard. I gasped and drew Mulder's attention. Reaching across the desk, I grabbed a handful of tissues. I had started to invest in tissues every time I went to the grocery store. I made sure that there was always tissue in my pocket or on the corner of the desk. Sometimes, Mulder would even pick some up for me. I knew he didn't enjoy doing it, because it hurt his heart, but he knew I needed them. He was very considerate.

After five minutes of holding Kleenex to my face, the blood finally stopped. I ran to the bathroom to wash my face, shrugging off Mulder's wounded puppy dog face. I didn't have the energy to console him right now. I looked myself in the mirror, wetting down the rough paper towels, I patted around my nose and upper lip. I managed to miss my white blouse. I silently congratulated myself. Crumpling the paper towel up and tossing it in the trash, I rested my hands on the sink and looked into the mirror.

My eyes were dull, showing dark circles. My hair that had a usual shine and bounce, now seemed flat and dry. My lips were somewhat chapped, if I had skipped lipstick. My nose seemed to always be red from all the wiping. I hadn't lost much weight, but I did notice my hips were a little more pronounced. I've always loved that I had a little weight on my hips to give the curvy effect, but now that was gone.

My outfits seemed to hang on my frame, rather than cling to me. I guaranteed I was the only one who had noticed this aspect, but it still bothered me. I jumped as there was a knock at the door.

"Scully, can I come in?" Mulder. I knew he'd follow me.

"Mulder, this is the women's bathroom," I said, my tone falling flat.

He entered anyway. I knew he would. I think he was more checking to make sure I wasn't indecent, which still may not have stopped him.

"Hey," he pressed, gently.

"I'm fine, Mulder," I tried, but a tear managed to escape. I was scared. This was a bad one. I am dying. My immortality was finally hitting me.

"I know. But, how about you go home anyway. Maybe read a book, take a bath, and then I'll bring dinner by?"

Now, I wanted to objected. I really did. I didn't like the coddling. I didn't want him to obsess over me. But I was drained. I glanced back into the mirror, and realized I looked like hell. In fact, I even looked like I was dying. Maybe a nap and a book would do me some good.

"Okay, Mulder. Bring dinner by around seven. Maybe Chinese," I asked like it was a question. Of course he would bring me Chinese. He'd go to China to get it for me, if I asked.

"Not a problem. Go-" He was cut off by another woman agent walking in.

"Hey, Spooky. This is the lady's room," she barked.

"Oh, my mistake. I wasn't thinking clearly. That coffee went straight through me. Sorry, Agent Morgan."

I cracked a smile. Mulder could be so cheesy sometimes. He caught my smile and gave me a wink. After he walked out the door, Agent Morgan gave me a strange look and went into her stall. I rolled my eyes and made my way out the door.

I went into the office to collect my things. I grabbed my purse off the coat rack and threw my phone inside. I threw in a couple of pens, my lipstick, more tissue, and my yogurt I didn't eat yet.

When I turned around, Mulder was holding my coat open for me to slip into. I gave him a shy smile and felt for my keys in my pocket. Still there.

"Okay," I sighed.

"Seven o'clock. Don't be late," I threatened with a smile.

I rushed home, ignoring quite a few traffic laws. Once hitting my apartment complex, I drove around the block twice, before I decided to parallel park. I never enjoyed parallel parking, but at this point, I was tired of sitting in the car.

Extracting my tired body from my car, I skipped my way up the steps, barely catching the elevator, and finally made it to my front door. Feeling for the right key, I unlocked the wooden barrier, and immediately flipped on the living room light. The light showered my living room, exposing it. My house wasn't a disaster. but there were signs proving that someone lived here. I set my purse on the table by the couch, and took a minute to think. What would I like to do first?

Well, for starters, I could just tidy up a bit. I did have a load of laundry to do, and maybe see if I have any wine laying around. I shrugged out of my coat, ready for some time to myself. Maybe that is all I really needed. Heading to the kitchen, I found that I was fresh out of wine. I pouted a bit, then grabbed a glass of water instead. I went to the laundry room and switched the wet clothes into the dryer, and put my last load into the washer.

Feeling a bit punk, I roamed into the kitchen washing the coffee mugs that I used these past few days, and hanged them on the coffee rack. Alright, enough cleaning. I went to the bathroom, determined to relax. Mulder sent me home for a reason.

Starting the bathwater, adding ample bubbles, I then turned around to pin up my hair. Reaching into the medicine cabinet, I pulled out my green face mask. Maybe it would bring a bit glow to my face, with any luck. Making quick work with my clothes, I dipped into my bath gingerly. It was a bit hot, but I think that's what I needed. Once my body was fully submerged I relaxed. It was only a few moments when I realized all my muscles had gone weak. I lost all control of them. They felt gooey. I panicked a bit at the thought of no control. After ten minutes, it was too much. I was past the point of relaxation. I needed to get out before I passed out.

Draining the tub, I stepped out, careful not to slip and break my neck. I reached for a towel, but realized I forgot to put one out. My robe was the closest thing to a towel, so I grabbed that. Wrapping it around myself, I closed my eyes, felling like a new person. My face mask hadn't quite set yet. It'd be another ten minutes before I need to wash it off. Deciding to read a book, I walked over to my book shelf. There were books here that I read multiple times, and there were books I still had yet to read. Running my finger over the titles, I spotted one that I hadn't read yet. It was a mystery novel. Like I needed any more suspense in my life. Maybe that is what I live for.

The book I choose is by Sue Grafton. It's called C is for Corpse. She is working on an alphabet series. I think she is on F right now, but I haven't even opened C yet. So, I thought I'd try tonight. The novel was much about my life. Kinsey Millhone, a private investigator. An investigator who thrived on adventure, talked trash, and kicked butt. In so many ways we were the same, but different in a lot of ways. I read the books because of Kinsey. She made me feel alive. I felt as if I were her, when I read these books. And today, I needed to feel alive. I needed to be that investigator who kicked butt and was fearless.

Sometime later, I heard a knock at the door. I look at the time on the stove, and it was already 6:50. Mulder was early. I had to smile at that. I hadn't realized how time flew by. I was enjoying this book far more than I thought I would. I padded my way to the door, forgetting my appearance. I checked through the peep hole, just to be sure. Mulder stood on the other side with food and a bottle of wine. Perfect. He knew how to make a girl smile.

"Mulder, you're early," I say, surprised.

"Yeah, well, the office was kind of lonely without you there. Throwing pencils gets old after an hour," he replied, sheepishly. He reached out and touched my face. "Is that you in there, Scully. This is weird. It can't be normal."

"Mulder," I giggled, swatting away his hand. "It's just a mask. It's good for my skin."

"Whatever you say. Why don't you go get dressed, and I'll plate up this food for us. I'm famished." I smiled back at him, not needing to say anything.

Walking quickly to my bedroom, I choose a pair of flannel pajamas, not trying to impress Mulder. I grabbed some lotion, and spread it over my arms, neck and legs, before dressing. I left my hair up, not daring to take it down. It'd probably be a disaster. When I walked out, I saw that Mulder had set up our food at the kitchen table and poured us each a glass of wine. He was grabbing napkins when he caught sight of me.

"Hey, you ready to eat?"

"Yes. It looks lovely. Thank you for this, Mulder. I really appreciate this." Sitting down together, at my kitchen table, felt different. Not different in a bad way, but it felt domestic. It was something Mulder and I never really did. It was something only I saw my parents do.

Usually, Mulder and I just popped open the to-go boxes and took up residence on my couch. But, not this time. I wonder what Mulder was trying to get at here.

"How was your day of relaxation? What did you get up to?"

"Well, I did some laundry and dishes," I started, and he chuckled. I glared at him. "Then, I decided to take a hot bath. After that, I picked up a book that I been meaning to read for some time. It was lovely. Thank you for asking."

"That sounds nice. You look relaxed. You smell good too." I don't think he meant to say the last part, because his eyes widened and his face took on a pretty, red shade. I decided to mess with him.

" Yeah, what do I smell like?" I made sure to ask, looking in his eyes. It was very rare that I could embarrass Mulder, so I took pleasure in it.

"Well, kind of like sugar and a hint of chocolate or cookies," he said, looking down. I had to smile.

"It's pure vanilla lotion. It does have a chocolate undertone to it though, doesn't it? I hadn't noticed," I tried to ease his embarrassment.

"It's very Scully," he stated. I didn't know what that meant, but I didn't want to press, either.

"This wine is perfect, Mulder. I was actually looking forward to a glass, but I realized I was out of wine. Next pack of beer we split is on me."

"I just wanted to make sure you'd let me in," he winked, throwing his last bite into his mouth.

After we both polished off our meals, we worked on the dishes together. I didn't even have to ask Mulder. He just started the sink and began to fill it with bubbles. After the dishes, he even offered to take out the trash. I was a bit surprised, but I wasn't going to stop him.

While he was gone, I poured us each another glass of wine, leaving a bit left in the bottle. I migrated us to the couch and turned on the TV. I turned once I heard the door open.

"Make sure you lock your door at night, Scully. There are some suspicious looking dudes lurking around."

"Mulder, stop being so protective. Just come sit down. We can find something we both agree on."

"I seriously doubt that, but we can give it a whirl," he kidded. I let him have the remote, but he let me decided on the show we watched. It took us a minute, but finally, we found something we both agreed on.

"I didn't think you'd ever be into this show, Scully," he joked, winking at me again.

We had turned it onto I Dream of Jeanie. I always secretly liked this show, for whatever reason.

"My parents used to watch it. I guess they just got me into it. Why?"

"You just keep surprising me, that's all."

"Shhh, this is my favorite episode," I said, leaning into him. I was a bit needy tonight, but so was Mulder. I felt him snake his arm around my shoulders, resting his hand on my hip. It felt nice to be held. Sometimes, that's all I really needed. I know if I asked Mulder, he would jump at the opportunity. But, sometimes, we needed space from each other.

I started to drift off to sleep, but then I heard Mulder speak. "I won't let you die, Scully," he said. I guess he thought I was asleep already.

"Mulder, I wish that were your choice," I sat up quickly, looking him in the face. I reached for the remote and clicked the tv off. We needed this talk. It was lingering over our heads.

"Maybe not, but that won't stop me from trying to save you."

"I appreciate the effort, Mulder. But, I don't want you off looking for a cure. This is cancer. It's real, and it's not easy to cure. Those are the facts."

"I know it's real. I see it in your face. I see it every time you get a nose bleed. I can feel it in the pit of my stomach. What am I supposed to do, Scully."

"There is nothing that you can do. There is nothing anyone can do. It may be what kills me, Mulder." My throat tightened just thinking about it. I wasn't scared of dying. I was scared of leaving Mulder and my family behind. I didn't want them to grieve over my death. I knew it was unstoppable, though.

"You can't say that, Scully. You can't think like that." I give the man credit. He is persistent.

"Mulder, I am a doctor. I have no choice but to think like that." I didn't want to crush his spirit, but I had to be realistic with him.

"Well, I refuse to give up. I will find a cure. I won't sit by and watch this beat you. You will not die from this," he said, with so much determination.

"Mulder, you can't spend all your time finding a cure. You just can't. I don't want to spend the rest of my days, wondering where you are. I want to spend my final time with you. I don't want you to be gone, while I am dying. I want us to spend time together, like this." I hadn't realized my voice had raised a few notches. I even began using my hands.

"And we will; I promise," he tossed back, stilling my hands.

"How will you ever find the time to be with me, and to find a cure?"

"I don't know. I'll do it while you sleep. I don't sleep anyway. I might as well make some use of my insomnia."

"Mulder, listen to yourself. You're talking crazy," I cooed, tilting my head, to look into his eyes.

"I'm not crazy, Scully. I am going to save you. Just trust me, okay?" How could I agree when he used the puppy dog eyes.

I relented, without a choice. There was nothing I could do to stop him. He was on a mission. Once Mulder had his mind set on something, he was going to get it. Maybe he could find a cure. Who knew?

"I do trust you. Just don't do anything stupid, trying to find a cure. Please."

"I'll do whatever it takes, to find a cure. Don't try to tell me differently," he tried not to yell, but his voice told me not to argue. I wasn't going to test him.

"Fine. You win, Mulder. But, I will not have you gone. You promised to be around. I don't want to worry about you."

"You have my word, Scully. We can have as many nights like these as you want. I won't be absent from your life, and I promise not to get myself killed," he cheered, getting his way. I sighed with a shrug.

"Well, than I guess I can't be mad at you then." I smiled. I didn't want to spend any time mad at him. It was too exhausting and heartbreaking. "I am tired, Mulder. Do you mind staying the night tonight?"

"Not at all," he smiled. "Where do you want me to set up camp?"

"If you promise to keep your hands to yourself, you can share the bed with me."

"I seem to be making a lot of promises tonight."

"And you better keep all of them, too!"

He threw his hands in the air with fake surrender. I slapped his stomach. "Turn off all the lights and lock the place up. I'll be in bed." He nodded.

I watched him bite back a sarcastic remark. Lucky for him too. I pulled back the covers to my bed, and flicked on the beside lamp. Propping up the pillows, I crawled in and listened to Mulder lock the place up and hit the lights.

I thought about how lucky I was to have someone like him love me. Yes. I knew he loved me. I could see it in his eyes. Every time I had a nose bleed, he looked like he wanted to die. If I died, he would certainly fall into depression without me. I had to try and stay strong for Mulder. We have to work together.

"Alright, Scully. Let's get it on," he teased. He just couldn't help himself. He would've exploded, if he didn't make one snarky comment.

"Very funny. I have an extra tooth brush in the bathroom, top drawer. Use whatever you need. Try not to make a mess."

"Thanks. I'll be out in five." I had started to doze, not able to wait for Mulder to return. There was something so soothing about hearing another human getting ready for bed, in your bathroom, just feet away. I jumped awake when I heard the door swing open.

"Oh, sorry. I didn't realize you were asleep already."

"S'okay, I wasn't really asleep," my voice betray me. I heard him chuckle.

"Whatever you say."

"Mulder?"

"Yeah."

"Can you just stay with me tonight. Maybe you can start looking for a cure when I am sleeping tomorrow night," I asked.

Maybe I was over tired. Maybe it was the wine talking. Maybe it was just me. Maybe I just wanted Mulder.

"Yeah. I'd like that very much," he agreed, sliding into bed. I felt a warm hand gently press my hip, silently asking for permission. Without realizing it, my body reached out for his. I pushed myself back. My back connected with his chest, and I felt his nose rest in my neck. It felt wonderful and relaxing.

"Scully, if I can find a cure," he paused. I nudged him a bit to continue. "Can we maybe talk about us and our future together?"

" _When_ we find a cure, we will talk about our future together," I confirmed. I felt him relax into our embrace.

"Good night, Scully."

"Sleep well, Mulder."

THE END.

RED


End file.
